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4/23/2004 03:09:00 AM | Justin

Glorious Appearance: More a"POP"alyptic Fiction

For those of you perturbed when Jesus was recently reincarnated as a pop-superstar by Mel Gibson, here's something to add to your general perturbation: The twelvth and final part in an epic series by Lahaye and Jenkins is now climbing U.S. bestseller's charts. The series is called "Left Behind", and begins with all the true believers being "raptured" to heaven, leaving we more skeptical types behind to do battle with the Anti-christ, his 400 million demonic horsemen, and a potpourri of other wholesomely satanic foes. The part that gets me is that the Anti-Christ, "Nicholai", coincidentally has a dayjob as the head of the U.N., and is in cahoots with the Europeans. From what I gather it's basically the U.S. and Israel versus the planet, and the fight keeps getting harder as all the "good guys" keep getting recruited into heaven at crucial moments, dubbed "soul harvests".

If you happen to see anyone around you reading one of these books, my suggestion would be to edge away, at first slowly, until you're a safe enough distance to break into an all out sprint.

Trying to intimidate people into believing in God by threatening to send 400 million demonic horsemen after them strikes at the very idea of freedom of religion. For some reason, threatening to send assassins after someone is criminal, but threatening fire and brimstone upon their head is consider the height of moral rectitude in our society.



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